Incredibly Happy

This post is more personal than theological. I just want to savor this day for some reason. I feel incredibly happy. For the past few months, I feel like I was trying to grasp both the future and the past, trying to pull them together in the present.

Maybe you've been there too. There's something in the past that you want to restore, and there's something in the future that you look forward to. 

Since going home, I was trying to evaluate the joy I feel. Had a happy discussion with my "teammates" at work. Happily had an early out from work. Had a happy and incredible time with some former co-leaders and my pastor last night till this morning. 

But I think that's not the reason why I'm feeling happy. I mean, sure, I love programming. And, yes, I really miss PCD-UMYFP leaders! But there's more...

I think it's because... I woke up early and didn't see a laptop before me, or a desktop near me. I see pews around me and I see a cross before me. I didn't have to rush prepping for the hassle of mrt, or think of choosing a better javascript framework. I was just there sitting... praying... happily. 

I guess what David said several years ago is still true to this day:

"For a day in your courts is better
    than a thousand elsewhere."
(Psalm 84:10a)

After a very long time, by God's grace, I have once again experienced this bliss of just waking up and walking in a silent place, looking up the sky, thinking of the Maker and smiling. Surely, nothing in this world compares to having communion with God. Absolutely nothing.

I'll end this short post with two songs that gave me LSS this week (and the lines I love most):

This Day (by Audio Adrenaline) 

It's six A.M
I'm so tired
The alarm sounds
And the new day begins
Before I go
And disturb this peaceful moment
I look to You 

I want to say a prayer
Before my feet can hit the ground
Lord I give this day to You

The Space Between Us (by Shawn McDonald) 

I'm still up, and it’s 3 in the morning
I try to sleep but my mind keeps going
Am I awake cause You're trying to speak to me
Lying here with my ears wide open
Can You fix what I know I have broken
There's a hole in my heart where I need You to be
But I'm right here, and You're right there
Will You take this wall I built and tear it down 

Do what You always do
Making the ocean blue [ = ocean and sky appear connected because of the color ]
Taking away the space between us
Filling it up with More of You

Parody: You're My Joy

You're My Joy
(a parody of "Overjoyed" by Stevie Wonder)
Psalm 73:25-26; Psalm 16:11; Jer. 2:13, etc.

Over time, I've been hoarding up treasures I love
Just to know that they never render satisfaction
Till I found the Pearl I searched all my days
Now I've got to throw my treasures away

All the gifts, which You give us, are perfect and good
But You are Your best gift, 'twas of You I've been dreaming
The heaven I want would look like a hell
Without God the One who makes heaven well

Chorus:
For whom have I in heaven but You?
And on earth, too,
There is nothing
That I desire beside you
And even though my flesh and heart grow weak
You're my heart's strength
You're my Joy and you're mine 'ternally

My vile heart had me shamefully turn the Fount down
Just to find, I hewed broken cisterns [that] can't hold water
I've now found out that without the Divine
The joy that I sought can never be mine

"God is not a tool for finding pleasure. God is not the shovel, so to speak, with which we dig for buried jewels. God is Himself the treasure. The Christian's pursuit of happiness is consummated when we find in God our all in all. He and He alone is our exceeding great reward. He is not a means to a higher end. He is the end."
(Sam Storms, Pleasures Evermore, p. 79)